To Be or Not to Be Done

I sit back and watch all of these BFP's pop up around me and I can't help but feel that motherly urge to have another!! I'm in such a hard place right now b/c 3 is plenty, but I don't feel done yet. I've always heard if you're unsure, don't do it (vasectomy and/or tubal). Logan is only 6 months old so I really don't understand why I have this urge. I've been having endometriosis symptoms since after Gavin, but I didn't know what they were. I just dealt with the pain and when I got pregnant with Logan they suddenly went away. I also read that that does happen to a lot of women. So when I got my first period after having Logan, the pain was back. :( I'm not talking about normal period pain either, I lay on the couch in a ball and try not to breath.. its bad.

After some research, I've found that the only thing that explains my symptoms is endo, which runs in my family. So if it is in fact endo, I won't be fertile much longer, b/c it will spread. I'm going to my DR to get a proper diagnosis and hey, maybe I don't have it!! But if he tells me I do, I know exactly what I'm gonna feel... the urge to have another baby before I can't anymore. I talked to DH about this, who is VERY done, but he's being really sympathetic. I think he understands how I feel, or is at least trying to. So instead of the quick and definite, "NO!" answer when I mention another baby, he's asking questions and not really fighting me on it. I'm hoping by the time Logan is 3, our house will be finished in the renovations department and we'll have a 4 bedroom, completed house. I'm hoping by that time I can talk DH into TTC.

I'm still unsure though.. I'm so young so I know I have a long time to decide.. but what if I don't? What if I go to the DR and my window of time is slowly running out on me. I think as a woman, I'll always have the urge to have another baby. I just need to decide if I want 3 or 4. This is NOT an easy thing to decide. :(